Jo(an) at my work

[seranade]

I have been sitting here listening to Joan (formerly Joe) talk to her friend on the phone about how her ex cannot deal with her changes. OMG..its painful, and cant work, damnit!

[Keyh]

Tell shim if they were really a woman they'd understand.

[seranade]

why didnt you reference 'she' instead of 'he' in your latest grammapole?

[Keyh]

why didnt you reference 'she' instead of 'he' in your latest grammapole?

because it's Sal I was talking about? Duh.

[Salurto]

why didnt you reference 'she' instead of 'he' in your latest grammapole?

Tough words from a guy who doesn't own a shirt.

[seranade]

haha..not trying to offend anyone...and...i started wearing shirts a few years ago..so..pfft!!

[Rjack]

My former boyfriend's sibling had a few issues when she went 'full time' at work but her managers were -very- understanding. Though living/working in Silicon Valley might have helped, too. When she went for her SRS, she was able to get medical leave from work and so had a job when she got back. Her former spouse and former boyfriend were both understanding and supportive, too (and amusingly she was still legally married to her wife when she legally became female).

It might just be that I am a bit more open minded (and have friends of just about every possible type), but I don't think there is anything abnormal in someone being concerned that someone you had a relationship with before can't handle your changes. It's no different than a woman (a genetic female) or even a man (a genetic male) expressing dismay over a former relationship person not 'understanding' a change like taking charge of one's life and going to school or getting a new job or even moving to a different location. One of the excuses my ex-husband used for abusing me was the fact I was more intelligent than he was and I was working on my degree (which my parents paid for.. and he blackmailed me to make them pay extra in order to -allow- me to go to classes) and on my self-esteem (while, ironically, bragging to his co-workers about the marks I was making).

As an aside (but not by far): Yes, I am offended by derogatory remarks made about other lifestyles. I just don't often make waves.

[seranade]

I hope you did not take my remarks as derogatory. I am very open minded as well. Maybe I am just expressing my own experience of knowing this person quite well as Joe and hearing the conversations as Joan. You are right, they are quite like other events where people take charge of their life. I certainly do not have a problem with someone preferring something other than I do. I am just finding it hard to concentrate and work!

[Keyh]

Alrighty, serious post from me.

Most of what I say is an attempt to be funny. Personally, I don't get offended by much at all.

I make decisions about things that are in my control and as long as I feel that it's right, I don't care what others say. I don't understand how people can get offended by other people making remarks about that. These things are a choice that I've made, people make fun of it, I don't care.

Stuff that is outside of my control, I don't care about either. I have a large forehead, big ears, nose, etc. It's not like I had a choice in the matter, people can say whatever they want, again, I don't care.

I'm not racist, my best friend is African American, but I enjoy cracking "racist" jokes including those of my own race (http://www.stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/ ftw). I have friends that are gay, both guys and girls, of which I talk to everyday. I can't say that I know anyone who's gone through a sex change operation, and I can't say that it wouldn't be awkward if it did happen, but it's their decision and I'm not going to knock it.

"Making fun" of people is really a way that guys show acceptance. Our ego doesn't allow us to express acceptance many other ways. That's why I'm always poking fun at Salurto, Lyricus, Baelyn, etc.

[Karysta]

well, people who are easily offended.. ugh, just annoy me. sorry, but it's true. I didn't take what sera said in any way as offensive, however, and more like he was being annoyed and distracted at a fellow co-worker. So he went into a little depth about who and what was going on, big deal. We all need a place to rant about annoying people from time to time. I'm often amused by how many 'open minded' individuals are the first to cry foul at others. Tolerance and acceptance as much as possible.

[Keyh]

well, people who are easily offended.. ugh, just annoy me. sorry, but it's true. I didn't take what sera said in any way as offensive, however, and more like he was being annoyed and distracted at a fellow co-worker. So he went into a little depth about who and what was going on, big deal. We all need a place to rant about annoying people from time to time. I'm often amused by how many 'open minded' individuals are the first to cry foul at others. Tolerance and acceptance as much as possible.

I'm offended that you're annoyed tbh.

[Karysta]

Good. I set out to offend on a daily basis. :P

And what's it matter? You just pick on me to be mean, and not because you accept me! *runs away crying*

[Rjack]

well, people who are easily offended.. ugh, just annoy me. sorry, but it's true. I didn't take what sera said in any way as offensive, however, and more like he was being annoyed and distracted at a fellow co-worker. So he went into a little depth about who and what was going on, big deal. We all need a place to rant about annoying people from time to time. I'm often amused by how many 'open minded' individuals are the first to cry foul at others. Tolerance and acceptance as much as possible.

I might have taken it out of context, that he was making a comment on the subject of what he was being distracted by, not he was being distracted (and the way he spelled her name is a way many do when they are being intentionally derogatory about someone transitioning).

I might be a bit sensitive about it since I have seen, first hand, the over the derogatory actions and responses to those of non-mainstream whatever (another friend of mine has even gotten death threats because she is openly trans, one of those threats was even recently on facebook as a response to a post she made).

Am I intolerant of those who are intolerant? YUP. I grew up in an extremely intolerant household where I was told, directly, "it's okay to be 'friends' with -them- but you should never want to date -one-" and I thought it was crap then, too, but I kept silent about it. Am I intolerant because I don't like or accept intolerance? Isn't that an excuse to tell people who don't like intolerance they should just go suck an egg and shut up?

As I said, most of the time I do keep quiet in certain settings.. until my annoyance meter is reached. It wasn't Serenade who has been pushing it the last several weeks (and over last weekend in particular) but that 'tolerance' point was hit in the same environment (and yes, I have actually said something, but more quietly).

But, taking my cue. I'll shut up and be 'tolerant' of those making remarks that aren't.

[Peeperr]

sounds like "he" made the right choice in becoming a "she".

[Grackture]

Trannies are weird.